Fan Corner
Section: Diary
This is Alicia's diary from official
site. Thx to Lenny & Benny for helping me with this section.
September 13, 2007
Japan
Hey...
Straight from Vegas to Japan. 13 hour flight. Crazy! But I'm happy to be over
here. It's been a minute and it's nice to introduce the music to everyone, of
all walks of life. The sick part is being 13hours ahead of NY time and 16 hours
ahead of LA time. Try doing Business on THAT schedule. kinda hard lol! Plus
my body is all confused..is it morning or night?? I have no idea;-) Right now
its 7:55 am NY time and 855pm in Japan. Its interesting how one day is just
begginning and the other is ending. IT's the illest thing. Who figure that out
anyway?? I think about strange things like that. who in the workd was the first
person to figure out time zones? $20 to whoever can get me the history of that
lol!
Did one of those small intimate performances last night. Most of the whole
room couldnt even speak english and here I am explaining every song and emotion
I was going through in order to write it. Funny thing is... they felt me...regardless,
they felt me. What an incredible gift music is. There is something for everyone.
It comes in all shapes and styles..it maybe the closest to freedom we'll ever
get. hmmmmmmmmm. Nonetheless, I'm DUMB tired! it's early but, I gotta get some
rest. just wanted to check in. say hey. Hope you're good.
Gonna start doing some buzz shows soon.... oooohhhhhhh! I CANT WAIT FOR YOU
TO HEAR ALL THIS MUSIC!
alright, be safe
talk soon
love
September 9, 2007
Hey Fam!!!
We just shot the video for "No One!" It was so serious!!! Depicting
the emotions of not letting ANYTHING get in the way of the good thing you have:
Love for your Family, love for your man or woman, love for your son or daughter,
love for yourself. Doesn't it sometimes seem like when you have something good,
there is always something or someone trying to break up or put down this good
thing? I feel like that sometimes. That's why I love this song so much. It empowers
me. Makes me feel strong and unstoppable even through the eye of the storm.
We had a couple of Fam members down at the video shot in LA. It was fly! They
hung out and watched as we shot one of my favorite scenes with my piano in the
rain. Then I was able to go over and say "what's up." We chatted for
a little bit and chilled. So 'big up' to the Fam that was able to make it to
the video!
I'm still JUST as amped, probably even more for you guys to hear the whole record.
The whole vibe... I can't wait to hear what your favorite songs are.
I'm getting ready for the Video Music Awards, so I'm at rehersal now. Getting
ready to start the fire!!!
WE'll catch up soon
one love
August 19, 2007
So this time it's been MAAAAADDDDD long since I wrote here. But I know you guys
forgive me since I've been grinding on this new music. haaahaaaaa!!!! This is
it though! Now is the time and I'm about less than a week away from being totally
done. I almost can’t believe it. This has ABSOLUTELY been the most profound
year of my life! I can’t even explain the depth that it goes, the things
that I’ve learned, The things that have made me first weaker than stronger
and finally over all a better person in so many ways. I can barely believe the
way things have turned out! I’ve never been more happy with a record! These
SONGS!!! Each one of them has such a personal and honest story that goes along
with them. Each one of them are a piece of my heart and I’m so excited
to be able to gift wrap it and present it to you.
The single is called ‘Noone” and I’m LOVING IT!!! I hope it’s
a bit unexpected and something that completely surrounds you, engulfs you and
sweeps you away. I hope it makes you feel good and strong and passionate and
makes you scream the words at the top of your lungs. I hope it does things to
you!!!! Hahahaha
As you can see I’m extremely exited about it and can’t wait for you
to hear it!
Honestly, I cant wait for you to hear everything!! Each song is so different
from the rest! You will NEVER have a chance to get tired. But as diverse as
it all is, it still has the true representation and foundation of who I am,
AS I AM now!
I have no regrets, no reservations, no hesitations, no DOUBT!
I am truly, totally and completely ready!!!
LETS GOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Much love and talk (and see you) soon
Ak
July 15, 2007
Just got finished reading all of your posts on Ann’s last Blog. (Big Up Ann!)
she’s great aint she??
I love it here because it’s just this simple world were you can be who you
really are, say what you want, feel what you feel and share it. I like that it
is almost this underground world that people discover naturally.
Let me just take a few to thank you for those beautiful words that you wrote,
memories that you shared, all the understanding and encouragement that you give
that you’ve always given.
There are 2 things I pray for often (We’ll, I pray A lot, but as it relates
to this…) The first thing is “something to say”. I ask for this
because I think that if God has Given me the chance to speak to a large amount
of people, I want to have something worthy to say, not just something that means
nothing. The 2nd thing I pray for is “to ALWAYS have the courage to be myself”,
Not only to be myself, but to be unafraid to do the unexpected, to do the things
that are not always The “safe” thing, because those are the things that
are the most enriching and the most exciting. I ask to be lead to where I belong
and to truly be able to hear, listen and FOLLOW my instinct. I know that is how
God speaks to us and I always want to listen. Anyway, not to get all heavy, but
These are 2 things that are really important to me, I’m learning.
because of this I am unafraid, I am not worried, I am not concerned. Somewhere
deep deep down I KNOW that everything that my life has been, has lead me to this
moment now, As with all of our lives. And I KNOW that I have a destiny that Is
to be fufilled, as we all do. and I KNOW that this Destiny is going to be something
special and moving and tremendous. as we all have. And although I don’t know
exactly how it’s all going to play out, I Do know that it is going to be
more than I could EVER imagine. As it is with all of us! and so I put my heart
into it, truly working hard and giving it my all and let GOD do the rest.
And that’s why I’m so DAMN excited!!!!LOL! Everywhere I go and everything
I do I feel like I am holding this HUGE secret that I just can’t wait to
let everyone in on…and that’s a great feeling! infact its a realy
SLY grin!!
Here’s a little taste of the process of what hapens after most of the
recording of an album is done:
SO for me, as you probably know by now, the recording process is really personal
and intimate. Nobody is really involved in it except Me, K, Ann, the creative
people I’ve been working with, Jeff, and peter (my A&R). Other than
that it’s like this Big mystery. So when the album is close to done we
start to get some of the important people at the Label to get into it. These
are the people who truly support it and make sure they get behind it to make
it win in everyway possible, like of course Clive, like the people who get you
to know all about it and push it to radio, television and get the stores to
buy it, the people who help to market and promote it. and thats just to name
a few. Then, there are those same people not only in America but in Europe,
in Asia, in South America…all over the world who get behind my record and
help push it to the top. Then there are other people like the ones who own different
magazines who help to review the album or give me the covers of magazines. There
are the people who help sponser the album and the tours and any events we might
need to do who have to hear the music and get excited about it. There are the
DJ’s and radio programmers who need to get into it and support it from
the beggining so that the music can be heard in many forums. and this is just
a small bit of the proces of who is involved to make an great album be heard.
And ALL these people have to be behind it and be excited so that they can help
me to bring it to you in the biggest and best way possible. It’s an ineresting
process, but it all lends to the overall feeling and enthusiasm of and for an
album.
So Since you weren’t able to be in these listening sessions (yet, at least)
let me at least tell you the names of the 6 songs we played:
1) Go Ahead
2) Superwoman
3) The thing About Love
4) Teenage Love Affair
5) Sure Looks Good To me
6) Like You’ll Never See me again
hmmmmmm mmmmmm…….Man oh man!!! do you see the sly grin????;-)
Everyday we get closer and closer and I’m humbly and gratefully looking
forward to discovering with you, the journey it will take us on!
Much love, as always
Ak
June 22, 2007
Ladies and gentleman we are getting close! I’m here in the room now mixing
one of my FAVORITE songs on the album “Like you’ll never see me again”
I think I told yall about this the first night that I was working on it. It’s
incredibly exciting to hear everything coming together to be ONE special body
of work! I know you feel like I’m torturing you because you haven’t
heard anything yet….but when you hear this you are going to have so many
of thoughts and feelings and things to say…I can’t wait to hear which
ones are your favorites…
Anyway, I’m to amped for words! and I have to leave for a flight at 5am and
still have to pack so I’m in trouble!…
So, I know this is kind of a cheap ass entry, and mad short, but I didn’t
want to go to long without saying hey….
I’ll write something longer soon
Mad love
Holla!
May 14, 2007
Hey...
Just checkin in....
Want to thank you for sharing some of where you are right now. What your feeling,
what's going on in your world, a lot of changes.... But I wonder if there is
ever a time that things are not changing?? Probably not. In one way or another
it always will be. But in that I find comfort, knowing that I will always be
finding out more, experiencing more and because of that becoming better. We
all are.
Someone asked me what my favorite song is to perform? That's a hard one! Cause
it depends on the night...but I'll tell you what, my fav songs to perform are
going to be these NEW songs. OHHHHH WEEEEEE!!!! I'm DYING for you to hear something...soon
soon soon I promise! and Thats my word it is going to be SOOOOO worth the wait!!!!
You know how much I appreciate the LOVE. That realness that my real ones give
and that to me is all that matters here. So with that, know that I am always
with you and proud of you, so keep shining bright as you can! REGARDLESS OF
THE HATEEEERRRRRSSSSS!!
Yall know what I'm saying!
With that I'm gonna get some rest, just wanted to check in.
Talk soon....
Ak
May 5, 2007
Whooohooooo!!
WOW! I've been out in LA for almost a month now. It doesn't even seem that long
but the change of atmosphere has done me good. This music man..... it's talking
to me.
I realize that I've had an incredible 6 months. So many ups and downs. like
really high highs and really low lows... it's shown me my character and what
kind of person I want to be. I guess It's what you call growing pains. More
and more I'm coming into myself and who I'm meant to be. I feel myself becoming
more of a woman and it's interesting to be conscious of that process, but also
very exciting and freeing. I'm heavy into freedom lately.
So tell me about you? I've read the message board but I can't get a feel for
what you're feeling right now. What's going on in your heads? Some of you have
been with me since day uno (most of you have) what is going on in your lives/minds/hearts
that you've been thinking about?
Bring me into your world.....
April 12, 2007
Life's Way
There should be an option of the moods you can select called melancholy... you
know, not sad, but not exactly happy... I guess "ok" about sums it
up. Anyway...I've been learning a lot. This has been such an interesting time
for me. A lot of growth, a lot of understanding, a lot of realizing that things
don't stay the same forever... they change shape.
I lost someone very very close to me 2 weeks ago. and dealing with that change
is not easy as I'm sure many of you know. learning how to live without someone
that for years you have grown accustom to seeing thier smile, hearing thier
voice, picking up the phone to call when you really just need a reassuring word...and
now they're not here. I mean, they are here....in your heart, in your memory,
in your soul, but they have changed shape and the physical is no more.
I find it is in the littlest thing, that you remember the most about them. the
most random things come to my mind at the strangest times.
I haven't written because this is all that's been on my mind and I wasn't sure
if I should or if I was ready to talk about it.
I guess it's a good sign that I am. I have come to terms with that beautiful
understanding that now I have one of the most glorious angels in heaven, watching
over me, protecting me, loving me now more than ever. but it's so hard...it's
so hard to know that I will have to go the rest of my life without, the touch,
the smile, the hugs, the words of someone so precious and meaningful to me.
But I'm lucky because for years, I have been blessed to have such a touch, such
a smile, such a hug and the moving words of my now in heaven angel. And I know
that those are the things that will come to me when I need them most and I know
I was recipient to, and witnessed what real, true, genuine, no strings attached
love is. And the thing that gets me.... is the way that SO many felt the same
way. As we recieved all the calls and all the visitors, I realized...what more
is there to life, then knowing how many you touched, by the simple words you
said, by the small gestures of love you gave, and time you took to let another
know how much you cared.
That is a REAL legacy, that is what REALLY matters.... that is Life's TRUE Way.
I am a better person because of the love I've recieved, for the time that WE
were able to spend and the love I was able to return and I'm GRATEFUL for that
time.
Hold on to what is dear to you, don't ever forget to spend time with those you
love, because when all is said and done, what really matters more?
Sendng my love to you
Alicia
February 27, 2007
I'm feelin' this....
This is an excerpt from an article that originally appeared on Daily OM.
"Every thought we have and action we take becomes part of the collective
energy of the planet. When we use our energy to bring light into the world,
it combines with the light brought by others to dispel the darkness. Though
we live in a world of duality, which helps us to experience the material plane,
we don't need to experience extremes to understand them. We can share our experiences
and understanding with others not from a place of condescension but of connection.
When the entire family of humanity understands that each of our thoughts, choices,
and actions affect us all, we will share an incredible level of consciousness-one
that puts our oneness above all else and helps us evolve into higher expressions
of our spiritual selves. Remember the next time you witness an action of another
that they are of the same earth as you but simply on a different conscious level
at this point in their life. Find compassion, bless them, and move along your
day in grace."
February 20, 2007
Peace to my folks!
I just wanted to write because last week I went ahead and tested out my audio
blog so that even when I couldn't write I could at least leave a nice message
about what was going on. But I came on here today to check if it had gone up
and it hadn't.... so I'm alittle confused about why it's not up but I know in
a couple of days at MOST it'll be up for ya'll to check out.
In the meanwhile I wanted you to at least know that I'm thinking about you.
And I'm not trying to have months and months pass without some posts;-)
How was Valentines Day for ya? Did y'all love yourselves? That's where it all
starts. Feel me! I had some fun, I went to a Common concert at the House Of
Blues. It was hot! That's my boy! and the way he put the show together was fly!
One of the sweetest parts of the show was when this guy got onstage, and common
asked him" Do you have something to say?" and the guy said something
about his girl being there by his side and showing him the good life and then
the guy got down on his knee and sang Princes Adore accapella!! Meanwhile his
Girl was like one table away from me LOSING HER MIND! It was a really sweet,
genuine, thoughtful and pure gesture of love. What an incredible thing to do!!
I don't even think Common knew what he had planned so it was extremely spontaneous.
It definately had the whole place going so on top of Commons skills it was a
great night!
Don't you love going to a great show where everyone is affected by the magic.
I LOVE MUSIC!!!!
So, did any of you guys find out about the Open Door Scholarship that I'm doing
with FTGU? For all my College bound geniuses!;-) I hope y'all get into it.
Other than that all is well. I hope this finds you in a great place and I'll
talk to you soon.....
January 26, 2007
Hey ya'll!!!
I'm just writing to thank you so much for all of your birthday wishes!!! I had
such a wonderful birthday! I really just let loose and hung out HARD! lotsa
dancing, and talking and laughing and singing. It was a ball!
Now, it's about time to do alittle reflecting on all the things that have happened
in my last year and all the things I would like to happen for this year and
how I'd like to make that happen. I like doing that! It helps me to be alittle
clearer on whats happened and where I'm headed.
I have to give an extra special shout to all of my fam who, for my birthday,
are participating in helping to furnish the Agape orpahnage!!!! THAT IS BIG!!!!
and the fact that you care is even BIGGER! These kids are so bright and gifted
and special and it just seems like every turn of thier life has tried to discourage
them...so them knowing that people like you are out there and care about thier
life and thier fights and thier needs. Wow! I can't even begin to tell you what
a hero you are for that! Every little bit counts and they won't forget this
and niether will I!!
As for this year! I have this feeling in my gut that it is really going to be
a TREMENDOUS YEAR!!!!!!!!!!! For all of us. it's time to speak up, speak out
and do what ever needs to be done to make not only a better life for oursleves
and our close friends and family, but for the world as an extended human family.
And my gift from you this year, proves that I have the baddeest fam on the planet!!!
Really, yall never cease to amaze me!
Thank you again for all of your kind words and wishes for me on my birthday.
all of the E cards and prayers! i send all the goodness right back your way!
SMOKIN ACES!!!! IT's today!!!!! GHEAAAAAAHHHH! Thanks to you for your support
not only with this, but with everything!
one love, my family
talk to you soon!
January 21, 2007
My Folks!
Let me TELL you!
I'll NEVER get used to it!
Ok, ok, ok let me back up....
So, Thursday was the premiere of SMOKIN' ACES... which I know y’all ALL
are gonna see when it comes out on January 26th! RIGHT!!??;-) (Well, all my
folks over 18 at least!)
So I flew in to LA on Wednesday to get everything together, get the gear right
and all-a that good stuff. I don't usually talk about this side of things but
we spent at least 4 hours going through clothes, pants, blouses, skirts, shoes,
jewelry, dresses: some to frilly, to summery, to colorful, to beaded, to heavy,
to skimpy.... well, you get the point! You know I had to be RIGHT!!!! This was
my first premiere EVER! (You only have ONE first time) Nonetheless, When I stepped
into this little black number I just KNEW that was the one! It was simple and
strong and casually sexy and I felt like GHEAH BABAY!!!!!
Ok, Please excuse my overzealousness but I'm trying to relay the exact level
of my extreme excitement!
Anyhow, by then it was late and so I hit the sheets (with visions of sugar plums
dancing in my head).
The next day I woke up.... handled the daily and then came back to get ready.
Everyone was with me...family...sharing the excitement. The whole crew.
Fast forward to being in the car...driving there... the whole Hollywood BLVD
was backed up like crazy. When we approached the theatre and the lights and
the crowds and the whole thing.... the whole bonafide movie premiere in full
effect. I'm in the car and no lie, I let out a nice big SCREAAAAAMMMMM!!! Well
more like a Squeal! but there I was.... So I stepped out of the car and got
my big huge smile on cause I couldn't help it!
Cameras were firing as fast as machine guns....lights tall and bright all around...a
million questions, a million answers....what a night upon the town....
Point is, this is always new for me...and I LOVE this movie. It is totally,
wild and crazy and out there. All the characters are unbelievably interesting,
tormented and distorted images of the darker side of society. Joe Carnahan is
a beast. This movie is such a complex mind trip and the people who love it will
DEF be waiting for the DVD or ‘On Demand’ just to rewind their favorite
part or catch that crucial piece of dialog that they missed while they were
saying "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHH SSSHHHHHHH*TTTT! DID YOU JUST SEEE THAT!"
LOL!
Anyway.... This movie is not for the weak at heart! And if you're looking for
a family flick or a spa day and a movie with your home girls than wait till
APRIL 20th to see Nanny Diaries! ;-)
This First for me was so special! I just had to share it with ya'll.
On another note have ya’ll checked out the in studio blog at www.krucialkeys.com/Blog
This Bloggin stuff is addictive dammit!
Now, here it is crack a dawn and we’re rockin’ in the studio havin
a ball!!
And I haven’t been able to tell you lately how excited and thankful I am….not
only for everything that is going on and is to come, but more importantly that
we are still here rockin! DAMN! Seriously…it’s amazing to me the bond
we’ve created (even through, my extended absences and periods of “When
the hell is Alicia gonna post-isms) and that my friends is priceless!
Much love for that!
Holla soon….
January 8, 2007
Sorry bout that, wasn't trying to break our Christmas tradition… but this
site is so new and I'm not quite up on the post side of things yet… can
ya understand?!;-)
How was your holidays and New Year? Mine was good. Very low key. I was recording
in Miami until the day b4 Christmas (Which I have to say, was not bad at all!
Weather was poppin!) So I just came home and chilled out with the fam. Took
it easy, nice candle lit dinner, ate well and was thankful for having the love
around me that sustains me.
This year I found myself feeling so torn about Christmas. I felt extra uncomfortable
with how it's been soooo commercialized and has only become this big reason
to spend ridiculously and needlessly, you know? Without meaning, without thought…
I know for some who grew up in more religious households, it has a much truer
and deeper meaning. I believe GOD is LOVE and so the holidays are definitely
about celebrating love and that's what I did and focused on. But the over-all
societal view and the emphasis that has been placed on only receiving, left
my heart with this strange feeling I couldn't get rid of and I kept questioning
what Christmas really means to me now, or rather what I WANT it to mean to me.
I want it to be more than anything physical, or tangible… I'd like it to
be more about others. About more than just the selfishness of our own personal
needs and desires. A friend of mine helped to feed 10,000 people this Christmas…
I really admired that! Something like that, that truly gives to someone else
as well as cherishing the time with your family and friends that really love
you. That to me…is the essence of Christmas. What about you? What are your
feelings about the holidays?
Anyway, moving on from the old and in with the new. HAPPY NEW YEAR! No matter
what is going on with life, it always feels like a brand new start when it comes
to the New Year. It's like we all get a chance to have a fresh clean slate to
write ANYTHING we want on! And I love that! This year one of my most important
promises I made to myself, is to be true to me. What I mean by that is to truly
let my own instincts and intuition guide me. Sometimes we get so influenced
by what everyone else has to say about what we should do, or we get so caught
up in wanting to please others, that we can lose ourselves in all that smoke.
This year it's my goal to stay clear and hear what my heart and soul are saying
so I can claim my own happiness. Everyday, every minute! I don't know if that
makes sense to you, but it makes sense to me! Shit! LOL!
So tell me? What have you promised yourself?
Gonna head back into the booth, but I def had to check you and let you know
I'm alive and doing so well!!! And this album….. boy oh boy!!!!! I can't
tell you how amped I am about this! I can't WAIT for ya'll to hear it!
Speaking of the album, K and I are doing a studio blog about the album process
so check out www.Krucialkeys.com/blog to be a part of the intimate process and
thoughts of the making of my album!
Wishing you all a truly blessed and TREMENDOUSLY fulfilling YEAR! 4 real! Give
it all ya got bay-be! What else is there??
One love family,
Talk to ya soon
A.K. The Freedom Rider
December 5, 2006
How are yall? Everything is good on this side. The Album is coming out incredible!
I'm lovin the zone!! Other than that I'm trying to get used to the new board
too... No worries, every time there is something new it takes a little while
for things to gel...and there are a couple of little things that I want to change
as well but overall I'm happy that we have a new site up and I'm excited about
all of the new things that I have planned for the new and improved AKFC. Lots
of footage, lots of special communication, lots of good contest and prizes and
so many ways for us to be in each others world. So it's on and poppin!
Other than that, I'm buggin' that it is already Christmas!! Especially with
all of the Christmas Songs that played the minute Thanksgiving was done. Did
you notice that too? Sometimes I feel like the Holidays are corporate America's
favorite time of month, just to take all of our money!;-)
Anyway, The holidays are so much more than that. Wishing you a beautiful holiday
filled with genuine love, warmth and strength of family and friends and food
enough to share with those who have none.
I'm headed to the studio, just wanted to jump on and say hey!
Hope this finds you well, happy and healthy.
talk to you soon
A to the K
November 18, 2006
Peace y'all.... Just was thinking aboutcha and wanted to say what's up! Feeling
good today. In La doing some writing and the weather is CRAZY!!!! like 75/80
degrees. How is it the middle of November and it is this hot? Now, I get why
people LOVE LA So Much. With this weather how can you not?
I have a quick question for you....
if you could have anything you wanted on this website....what would you have
it be? And keep it clean and creative pleeeeeeeaaaassseeee;-) thanks!
Holla at me.. I'm wondering what your thoughts are on this is. What would make
it better to you?
Hope this finds you all feeling great!
We'll talk soon...
love always
November 14, 2006
Hey my family!
Am I on punishment??;-) (just kidding) But I know It's been a minute since I
wrote. I apologize for being away for so long, but you'll be happy to know that
I took some much needed time for myself! I went away to Egypt and if I could
ever tell you how moved I was being there! Seeing things that have been in existence
for so long, thousands and thousands of years and still standing! So much History,
Strong and proud and able to withstand the heaviest of storms. From the Valley
Of the Kings to the tombs, temples and the pyramids, I was shown over and over
again how much power we have just between our minds and 2 hands. Faith, Hope
and perserverence is everything!
It was truly inspiring and reminded me that everything one can EVER dream is
possible! There is nothing that is unobtainable, nothing that is un-doable.
That's how I felt when I looked all the way up to the sky at the great pyramid.
I felt that, anytime I feel heaviness or sadness that comes sometimes, I will
remember that feeling of how much power there is within, to create and build
anything and everything imaginable.
That's a great feeling to remember to always keep close to me. (Keep it close
to you too!)
Other than that, I've really been getting into the zone of the album. Been experiencing
so much and have been exposed to so many sounds and rhythms. It's all coming
thru in a special way.
I'm very excited about this next journey thru music.....It's exciting!
About 7 months ago I decided that I wanted to Run a Marathon. So I trained and
trained and trained and just last week I ran my first marathon in Greece! I
choose Greece because that is where the whole concept of the marathon originated.
It was because a guy ran from the city of Marathon to Athens to spread the good
news that the war was won. And the Miles between The city Marathon and Athens
is the amount of miles all marathons are......So, It was really crazy!!!!! I
MADE it!!! It took me 5 hours and 30 min, but dammit, I made it!!!! And I'm
so proud! It feels good to be able to set a goal for yourself and then, work
hard for it and achieve it! Gheah!!;-)
How have yall been? How's life? What are you feeling? What are you thinking?
What are you going thru?
Just wanted to get back in touch and let you know how I am and see how you are...
Holla at me
Much love, always to my fam!
You're always on my mind
be safe out here..And we'll talk soon
Ak
July 13, 2006
Hey Family!
How r u?
How was your fourth?
Sometimes the fourth gets me to wondering how much of our independence is an
illusion? And how much true independence do we actually excersise?
In so many ways we are so blessed and have so much and so many of these "holidays"
we just know them to be days that we don't have to work or have long weekends.
There's so much celebration and partying surrounding them but do we even know
what we are really off from work for? And what we're celebrating about?
Anyway, not to start this off all intense but, its just interesting to think
about. On the other side though, spending time with people u love and love to
be with is always a beautiful thing.
That's what I did on my fourth
Good food, good folks and a great time. It made me give thanks for all the things
to be thankful for.
Did u have fun? What did u do?
Right now I'm in Kingston, Jamaica, for my first time getting ready to do the
video for the remix of Baby Cham's new song "Ghetto Story" that I
did with him.
It's gonna be HOT!
Baby Cham has been doing his thing for a minute but now is getting recognized
in a bigger way and I love how this song takes u back to our personal younger
days storys.
We all have different stories, different struggles but eventually we will get
through!! That's what this song makes me feel.
If u haven't heard the song yet, check for it.......get into it.......;-)
So, that's what's up.
Just wanted to hit u and see how u were and let u know I'm good!
Plus, all my folks in the tri-state area...If you're looking to experience that
good music, that TRUE HIP HOP Come through to SOB's in Manhattan (200 Varik
St @ the corner of West Houston) Tomorrow: Tues, July 11th at 9pm to celebrate
the release of Krucials EP "Take The Hood Back" featuring ILLZ!
It's on and poppin!
I'll talk to ya'll soon.....
Till then, Be safe!
June 29, 2006
Hey Fam!
I'm writing from the studio. In here doing my thing, writing, absorbing all
the information that I have been experiencing so that I can make sense of it
all and write about it. I love this process. I miss it when I'm not doing it!
But I was thinking about one of the posts y'all wrote that I was reading through
on the message board. The topic was something to the nature of what "Celebrities"
Really think about their fans.
It interested me because In essence it really answered the question of what
FANS, or better yet, lovers of music think of the artist they like.
Some of what was said kind of had a more negative tone to it. Giving the feeling
that some of you felt that Celebs USE their fans just to make a buck or get
exposure, that they don't really care about the true connection or the personal
side of it all.
I guess that’s true in some cases. Some people are just horrible
witches and are totally out for themselves cause that's the kind of shady world
we live in. But I think on a whole True artists (especially) are COMPLETELY
grateful for the love and support they receive. I think true artists know that
each individual who has a connection with them and their music is a SPECIAL
person who helps them to get their words out there. I think the real ones, know
that each day is a blessing and they want to thank you for falling in love with
the music over and over again and going toe to toe when someone wants to bash
your favorite artist!;-)
I mean true, can EVERY letter be personally answered? Probably not, but at shows,
or meet and greets, awards shows or even a chance meeting on the street, I think
a real artist would want to make it clear how thankful they are for that fact
that you are excited to see them. I know that’s how I feel.
Even if I'm exhausted, grouchy or heartbroken I always try to do all I can to
show the appreciation that I have for the person saying, " I admire you
so much" or "I love your music".
It seems like with everything being so accessable the real love for a great
artist has turned into nothing more than pages to fill a gossip magazine. But
at the essence of it all.....you are the reason we are here, the reason we can
sing and be heard, the reason that the love of music will never die and unites
us in the most wonderful way...... and I know that post wasn't direct at me
but if I haven't told you lately I'm so grateful to you! I'm thankful for every
letter, every post, ever Myspace message, every excited face in the audience,
every chance I get to shake your hand or give you a hug in person.
Anyway, I know there are some crabs out there, I've met ‘em
and that made me vow to neva be like that;-)
One love, just sending a thought your way.
Hope you're enjoying the beginning of summer. I LOVE THE HEAT!!!;-)
Talk to you soon,
Alicia
June 13, 2006
Music Music Music Music!!!!
I've just been in the studio VIBIN'
It's the best feeling. Just to get back into my zone on that side of things.
No cares, no thoughts, just abandonment! That's how I'm on it right now.....
Abandonment.....Freedom.......I Like it!
I'm sitiing here listening to Gnarls Barkley. I'm Lovin them. Fresh, Fun, creative.
Need That.
and Summer is around the corner. Everythings feeling all good. Smelling good.
Sun on my skin.
Even all this rain that we've been having has been right on for me.
I took a run in the rain. It felt so good to just get wet to the point were
you don't know if it is persperation or rain.......
Anyway, I'm talking about all kinds of things but as you can see I'm feeling
great. So. I just wanted to holla, let you know I was thinking aboutcha
I've been kind of rebelious on the electronic side.
just focusing on these songs in my head. When they start circling around and
bumping into each other I have to get them out;-)
So, let me ask you....who would you like to see me collaborate with?
Something INTERESTING
just your opinion
I have some crazy ideas, but I was wondering what you thought.
Whenever I start writing though, I like to get in my own zone first. I like
to listen to what my spirit is saying to me, what's in my mind. It's one of
my favorite parts of creating. listening.....
So, I'm headed back to the studio now
to get that good music going
Much love family,
Talk to you soon.
June 5, 2006
A while ago when I wrote, I told you alittle about part of my trip to Africa.
There is still more I need to write to u on that side, but while we were in
Durban, Nightline came to see some of the things Keep A Child Alive is doing.
They came with me while we visited clinics, while I talked to the people and
really got their side of the story, while we visited teenagers in Soweto who
are raising their own brothers and sisters since their parents have died from
AIDS and while I visited grandmothers who's children had died and are left to
raise their grandchildren. They were with me when I first saw the building that
with your help and support and donations KCA purchased! This building is incredible!!
Right now we call it the blue roof building and we plan to turn it into a never-b4-seen-state-of-the-art
facility that will help the surrounding area of Wentworth, Durban which is 40%
infected, receive the kind of treatment, care and opportunities that everyone
deserves.
Its all very exciting and so tonight on ABC at 11:30pm is the airing of some
of my pilgrimage to Africa on Nightline.
I def need yall to tune in and check out the way that this trip has totally
changed my life and how you and I together are doing so much to change the lives
of others.
For more info go to KeepAChildAlive.org
One love
Talk soon
A.
May 19, 2006
Just hopin' on for a quick minute to spread love to everyone who has been showing
nothing but love!
I feel all late to this myspace world, but it's fun to see all of your pictures
and faces and accept you as friends.
I know this is mad short but I'm on my way out the door. I went to that Roots
concert last night at radio city. BIG UP TO THEM for that real music and real
passion. I had FUN! The whole crowd was rockin'. You know how much fun it is
when you can just zone out to good music and everyone there is on the same page
as you...no frontin', no ice grillin' LOL!
Anyway, for real I'm MAD late, I gotta run out the door. I'll be on ALICIAKEYS.COM
alitte later to give yall a more indepth update.
Don't forget to check out KRUCIALKEYS.COM and MBKENTERTAINMENT.com
One Love to ALL my people!
AK
May 7, 2006
Family-
Its been a minute, I know
But so much has gone on in my life.
First of all I cant even believe its May already,
But the weather feels so good. You know Im a sucka for summer. Theres just nothing
like when the weather starts to break.
In a way I dont even know what to say really. I think thats why its taken me
so long to write. How can I put it into words?
Here I am, back from Africa.
Africa!
People keep asking me, How was it? or I cant wait to hear all about it
But how can I explain it? How can I really put into words what I saw and felt?
Im a writer aint I? Aint that supposed to be what I do? Yet, with as many songs
and thoughts that I have as a result of this trip I still dont know how to say
exactly what is inside of me, the way I felt, the inspiration, the devastation,
the frustration the mind numbationok, thats not a word, but u feel me.
Ive seen so much. My spirit has absorbed so much, yet Im speechless. I get so
riled up and I have all these thoughts and things to say and yet, it may just
all have to come out through song. Thats how it seems its going anyhow. Its
just going to pour out of me.
So, I want to take you back to one of the entries I wrote In my journal about,
so you can feel what I felt while I was there and then we can talk from there
Here.
Mombasa, Kenya April 6, 2006 (myspace entry)
Today was the first day of this incredible pilgrimage.
We went to one of the first clinics that Leigh (The founder of KCA) and Keep
A Child Alive built for children to be tested and treated for H.I.V.
Its called The Family Care Clinic and its a wing in a bigger hospital.
It was very moving to step foot in there and physically see, with my own two
eyes, the result of a show I did so long ago when the Diary album first came
out and KCA partnered with AOL and was able to shed a little light on the situation
and get people involved. All the people that were moved to do something are
the reason why this place is running, working, ticking. We are helping and it
was really AMAZING to experience this!
When we arrived, little girls singing a beautiful African song and then a youth
group, who spreads the word about safe sex and abstinence, singing Fallen to
me welcomed us.
Thats really big there. Groups of young people doing stage plays, singing and
acting to show what is going on with the AIDS pandemic. Its so fly to see our
generation so strong. Even stronger than the adults in many cases and really
being verbal and unafraid to speak up!
So we walked around the hospital and saw many children and families who were
there for treatment. I met and spoke to Molly and Weston- who both have AIDS
and are healthy from using the ARVs Keep A Child Alive provides. I also met
Anne and Brian who Ive heard about for a long time because Anne is one of the
main reasons that KCA exists. She helped to call Leigh to action because Anne
planted herself in front of a clinic about 5 years ago and said she wasnt leaving
until she got the medicine for her sick and dying son that was available in
America. It was that moment of understanding the pain a mother must feel, and
the unrelenting passion that a parent would have to keep their child alive that
gave Leigh the whole idea of which KCA was based on. So meeting Anne was something!
After seeing everything that was going on and meeting this adorable little boy
named Gabriel (who just grabbed onto my hand and never let go)
We went into what is called The Slums to meet Husna and her grandfather Samuel.
Husna and Samuel are one of the most common example of the Aids Pandemic-The
mother gone, passed away from AIDS, the child left behind with AIDS and the
only one left to raise the child is the grandparent. But Husna and Samuel are
special because Samuel LOVES Husna with all his heart enough to close his business
(their main way of eating and making a living) and stay with her everyday to
help her with her treatment (which is a pretty in depth process so you need
someone totally concentrated just on giving the child the treatment)
Its pretty incredible.
You see nothing but dirt roads, broken down homes, tin roofs, beautiful children
in tattered clothes, probably their only pair, no shoes but so striking and
playful. The most beautiful faces Ive ever seen. Shy and innocent. How? I dont
know but these kids are so pure.
We walked into Husnas house-, which is a small small room in a community of
many small small houses that many poor families live in. A communal area for
showers and bathrooms that everyone shares, no electricity unless you can buy
it (you pre-pay it each month) which most people cant, your living quarters
is a small square with 2 beds and at least 5 people occupying a tiny, sweltering
hot place. One girl Erika spoke to said that it was 7 of them in one of these
tiny rooms and most of the time 2 or 3 of them had to sleep on the street because
there just wasnt enough room for everyone.
Ive never seen anything like it. NEVER! I cant even describe it well enough
to really paint the picture.
Still, they are so strongly connected to GOD. Saying, With God all things are
possible
One might ask, Where is GOD Among all of this? But there is still so much real,
truthful faith and belief. And family is so important.
Husna, her sister and her family are stigmatized and ostracized because Husna
is infected. The whole neighborhood says, Dont play with Husna, and dont talk
to that family. Samuel is forced to take them far away to a school that takes
a long time to walk to, where nobody knows them, so they wont be tormented.
So, before I left I made sure to give Husna and her sister a BIG hug in front
of EVERYONE so they know, that Im not scared of them, that I think they are
beautiful and deserve the love and acceptance that everyone does.
Her grandfather Samuel has one shirt. ONE good shirt and has more dignity than
most of the people Ive ever met. It takes 200 dollars to go to school for A
YEAR in Kenya and we spend that in hours on handbags, shoes and jeans.
Its crazy the way that this trip put things in such perspective
This is just half of my first journal
Ill write you the rest the next time.
But enough about me
How are you?
Oh yea, and dont worry, I dont feel abandoned for myspace LOL!
Talk soon
October 27th, 2005
I am eternally humbled by the love and support that I receive from you. Seriously!
One of the main things I try to do, is the best I can. And then whatever comes
of it, at least I know I am proud of myself and that I feel content with the
work and effort I put into something. But to feel the appreciation reciprocated
so fully and completely amazes me. Seriously! I've learned to expect nothing,
but dream of everything I possibly can, then, there is no end, just endless
beginnings. I like it like that.
Another thing I like to do is give thanks. I like to give thanks for the little
things and the big things, the medium things, and the things that hurt cause
I know they are helping me to grow if I am listening closely enough. So, I want
to thank you because there is no time like the present and one can never say
it enough. Thank you for your genuine love and support. To me that is one of
the best presents in the world.
Now, let me answer a few of these questions that have been long overdue. Forgive
me in advance to for not being able to answer every single one. I
wish I could ;-)
1) When did you realize your true calling, your sole purpose in life?
When it came to singing, playing, writing, and performing, I knew it was for
me since the day my nervous self stepped on stage when I was 4 years old in
Kindergarten and sang "Somewhere Over The Rainbow", then I have felt
a sense of freedom when I sing, play, write and perform. In regards to my sole
purpose, I kind of hope that I never have only a SOLE purpose. I want to have
many purposes, and the more I live the more I hope to discover them.
2) How do you stay so humble in such a crazy industry?
I've always believed that fame or money or power or success or whatever you
want to call it, never changes you like people always try to say. Instead, it
makes you into the person that you always were but just felt you had to hide,
for whatever reason. I am a good person, I want to remain a good person, I want
to give love and receive it, and everything I do I think about whether or not
I would want it done to me and I never take anything for granted. Not ONE SINGLE
MOMENT. And that I feel, is how I am able to stay myself at the core.
3) How do you feel when you hear yourself on the radio or see yourself on TV?
The first, first time I ever heard my song, it was in a little room at some
convention years ago, with a bunch of industry executives. They just threw
on the song, on the humble, and the minute I heard it I was so embarrassed that
I ran out of the room. Jeff still makes fun of me because of that. Now,
I like to listen or check out a performance to give myself a little constructive
criticism. Cause I will always be a student of the game. And I still feel amazed,
and excited that it's little ole me on TV or that people sing the words of the
songs with me and it makes me proud. But mostly I don't really watch or listen
or read EVERYTHING. Something about over analyzing myself feels a little unnatural.
4) Do you ever get weirded out when fans think they know so much about you?
Naw, not really. I usually just take it as a compliment. But there was this
ONE time when I had to have my wisdom teeth out and I was trying to plan when
would be the best time to do it since I would need to take about a week off.
About a week or so before I was about to have it done. I was doing a performance
and someone yelled to me from the audience about me having my wisdom teeth out
and I hadn't even done it yet!! And NOBODY knew I wanted to do it except my
closest and most private folks. That kinda weirded me out and then I just said,
"Oh, it's official, they know more about me than I even know about myself!!!"
5) If you could go back to Alicia Cook for a day, what would you do?
I'd ride the train! From 42nd all the way to the Grand Concourse. I'm still
considering doing it now anyway!J
6) Are you a control freak?
I guess I am. I like to know that what I do, and what I'm involved in is the
best I can make it and I learned early that if you trust other people with your
vision, or what your trying to say or get across you will usually be disappointed.
That doesn't mean that I don't have WONDERFUL people who help me pull it off,
but I like to know every move and put my vibe into every ounce of it. I don't
think being a control freak has to be a bad thing as long as you don't turn
into an evil bastard!!
7) Don't you just hate packing?
Yea, I do! I'm never sure exactly what to bring but I have to admit, I'm getting
better at it after all the times I have to do it. Practice makes perfect I guess.
8) Do you suppose your life would be different if you had your father while
growing up?
Yes I do. I think my life would be completely different, and not necessarily
for the better to be honest. I believe that God puts us in the place where we
belong and I do feel like I would be a totally different person. Maybe I wouldn't
be as independent or strong-minded? Maybe I would feel insecure about myself?
Who knows, but I don't feel any regret about it. I've learned a lot and through
all ups and downs and sideways shyt. I am still glad about the way that I grew
up. God knew exactly what was right for me.
9) If you could give advice to parents about raising their teenager, what would
it be?
Well, each situation is different, and I feel a little strange giving advice
to a parent because I'm not one. But I believe you have to follow your instincts.
I think that keeping an open relationship is key.
Encouraging honesty so that even if it's not exactly what you want to hear at
least they would know they could come to you. Feel like there has to be boundaries
and definitely rules, but at the same time you have to give people space to
grow and spread their wings and find their own way and voice. Mostly I'd say,
stay on our a$$ and help us see the bigger picture and don't take no shyt! But
do fun things with us so that we get the opportunity to see new things and experience
things with you. It will keep us in contact with one another in some way. And
help us find things to do
that teach us something that we have a love for. You never know where that will
lead.That's just my perspective, but I'm sure you know much better than me.
All the best;-)
10) Will you ever make an album that is purely classical or jazz?
I have thought of this. I would like to do it. I have thought of doing brand
new Jazz and classical classics and then touring either with a quarter or just
a piano. It's wide open! There is so much that can happen.
Will you ever tour in Central or South America?
I'm dying to!!! Every time we set it up something crazy happens and it doesn't
work out. But I am not giving up and I will make it happen for sure. I can't
wait to experience the music and the vibe there and of course see my homies
like Klaudia C.
What does the "J" stand for?
Joseph
Is your personality the same in your private life as it is in public? Or do
you have a "professional personality" and a "real personality"?
I am who I am, and that's 4sho! No matter what! But everyday is different and
obviously there are some days that I feel low or down but I have to work and
I try to put on a happy face so I don't spread whatever I'm feeling to anyone
who doesn't deserve to feel the negative energy that I may be feeling. But I
don't have two personalities. What you see is what you get. Especially at a
show, however I feel, I usually let it all out there.
Aight ya'll!! You had some really great questions and I hope that I can answer
some more, but hopefully this answers some of the things that your were wondering.
Much Love,
And we'll talk soon
Sep 1, 2005 01:13 AM
Hey Family-
I am checkin in to share my support and honestly, feelings of devestation. It's
so unreal what is going on. I barely know what to think or say or feel. It's
like everything else seems so unimportant. All I'm wondering is how could it
have gotten to be so bad? And what about the "forgotten" people? The
ones that couldn't afford to evacuate, and have no place to go? The ones who
are trapped, praying for someone to save them? What about them?
In a way I feel so helpless but I also know that these are the tests that bring
out the best in us as human people. These are the things that go beyond color,
and religion, and sex and differences in beliefs. None of that matters. All
that matters is us bonding together and giving support. Time, Money, clothes,
food. The necessities. The bare essentials. I know there are some networks planning
some relief shows to help generate and raise money for all the people that need
it right now down there. That will be one way for us to know how to contribute.
Of course, calling the Red Cross, like was mentioned in one of the threads,
would be a great idea as well to see what is really needed and how we can help.
Or even speaking to someone you know that was personally there, or has family
there, may give you an idea and a way to help someone.
Sometimes I wonder is God testing our compassion? Saying, now more than ever
we need to be ONE HUMAN PEOPLE, caring for each other like we do our own blood
brothers, sisters, mothers and fathers. Can we stand up to this challenge and
show GOD that all that has been given to us has not gone unnoticed and we understand
the urgency that is our duty and find even even one small way to help change
someones life that is living this nightmare and needs it desperately?
Tonight and today and tomorrow, let's all say a prayer for those that are suffering
and pray that this doesn't last any longer and pray for GOD to watch over all
of his children and bring them to safety. And then when we get up on the morning,
lets vow to do SOMETHING! ANYTHING! Even what seems like the smallest thing,
lets DO IT! and help to save our extended families.
Stay safe. Be smart. Take action.
Lets get involved!
This is our chance...
All my love and heart goes out to you and all those who have lost so
much and are suffering, don't give up hope.
Keep the faith in goodness.
Aug 14, 2005 09:51 PM
Hey-
I'm stuck in the damn airport. I've been here for like 3 hours cause there is
a crazy storm coming in and holding any incoming planes up. Sometimes you have
to realize the things you can't control and let it go. That's hard to do sometimes,
but right about now I have no other choice;-)
I'm happy some of you have heard "Unbreakable" I am so excited about
this live album. It's always a pride and joy kind of feeling to do things for
the first time. So I've been locked away in the lab mixing the album and making
sure that this unplugged album will stand the test of time. So hopefully years
and years down the line this will be something that is remembered and loved.
ANYWAY, how has your summer been? I finally made it to the beach the other day.
I forgot How much I love it there. We stayed there until the sun set and I swam
out onto the floating dock and watched it set....well at least I tried but there
were to many clear jellyfish (the kinds that DONT sting) and
I got too weirded out! LOL! B4 the summers over I'm gonna try to head to some
kind of amusement park, like great adventures. that will be fun. Nothing like
a good loud scream of abandonment!
They told us they were waiting for one more flight attendant who got stuck in
traffic before we can take off, and apparently now she's here. So let me go
before I miss the flight I've been waiting so long for......;-)
b4 I go, are there any burning questions you've ben wanting to ask me....good
ones, not the average silly ones, but something you've been wondering that I
never answered. I mean I can't imagine what it is, sometime I feel like you
guys know more about me than I do! LOL Anyway, it's been awhile since we've
done that, I'm I'm really interested in
finding out, what you wonder......
Wish me a safe fight, and have a good night
talk to you soon...
Jul 17, 2005 07:42 PM
A Big Big up TO BROOKLYN!!!! For welcoming me during an amazing taping of my
very first unplugged album. Yeah! BK All day!;-)
A Big Up to everyone from NYC, Around the country and around the world who came
through with so much love, good energy and excitement! The vibe was soooo right!
And A BIG UP to everyone who wasn’t able to physically be there but who
was there in spirit. I felt yall and I want to thank you for giving me so much
love and support. I promise when the show airs and the DVD comes out you will
feel like you are right there with me, cause you are!
This Thursday still has me on cloud 30-something! It was so beautiful to be
able to end an incredible couple of years and this album with this tribute to
music at its essence. Where it’s all about the songs, the music, the people
and how it moves us.
Each and every song has a different flow. I did this special, just for yall
so we can enjoy this moment forever! Feel me?
It felt so good to be able to be in such an intimate place and see each and
every face, so many of them I’ve known for years. We’ve been down
with each other for years! That realization made my heart smile and it felt
like old times when it was just me and a keyboard, a couple of spontaneous jokes
to break the ice and my songs.
This time I did have a little more than a keyboard;-)
I had my drummer, Paul John
My MD (musical Director) Onree Gill
My guitar Player, Arty White
My bass player, Steve Mosten
My man Pablo Baptista on Percussion
Chops on the horns, and flute
A string quartet
And a 9ft piano
And every moment felt special
Whether it was a raw version of Woman’s Worth, a funky version of Heartburn,
the strings and me on a remake of one of my favorites called “Every little
bit hurts”, Us having to redo the intro because the mics for the percussion
had a technical issue, of one of the new songs I introduced (that was fun!)
It was something that felt unique, like we were in someone’s living room
vibin’ out
And I’m so happy to share this place, this moment in time with ALL of you.
It is a beautiful blessing that we ALL get to share in.
Big Shout to Common, Mos Def, Damian Marley, Krucial, Jeff Robinson, The whole
Krucialkeys family, MBK and MTV for coming together with me and making this
something timeless, something that will last forever!
And those of you whose eyes are reading this at this moment, I am so grateful
to you! You are my inspiration, yall are my solid rocks, and you are my family!
And I love yall truly!
Forever your friend,
AK
May 30, 2005 07:43 PM
Heeeeelllllooooooooo out there!!!!!!
What's good?
Everything is good for me on this side because I’m HOME!!!!!! and I am
soooo excited to have finished such an amazing tour! an unbleiveable album run!
and just experiencing so much about myself and life! and I made it!!!!!!! 1
year and a half on the road and I’m still standing strong and feeling great!
to be home is like the most exhilarating feeling!
My bed, my sheets, my pillow, my kitchen, my couch, my slippers, my own space…....
of all the places I’ve been to, theres nothing like being home.
How can I begin to explain all that has gone on? from the amazing concerts that
we rocked out to together, to the legendary weekend in Santa Barabara with Ms.
Oprah and some of the most amazing woman I’ve only dreamed of meeting and
talking to all being in one room, to traveling all over the world, to going
to schools with FTGU and really touching and talking to people and being involved
in something special, to this upcoming prilgramage that I’m doing with
KCA…theres so much. Where do I begin?
I think I’m having sensory overload:-)
(in a good way)
and that’s why it’s such an incredible feeling to just be able to
be here, on my couch, with no where to go, for the first time in so long and
just talk to you..…
So what’s been up?I know ya’ll have been growing so much and going
through soo many different things and experiences and now that summer is coming
doesn’t it feel so good? just to know that the weather is going to be nice,
and all the summer days and nights yet to feel.
I’m telling you, booooyyyeeeee this summer I’m gonna have fun! I’m
going to go to museums and photo galleries, I’m gonna go swimming and to
the beach, I’m gonna visit family I haven’t seen and cousin’s
I haven’t hung out with in a while, I’m gonna barbQ, and play cards,
I’m gonna take long drives with all the windows down blasting my favorite
songs, I’m going to be me in a way I haven’t been able to in a while
since we’ve been on the grind for so long!
I guess you can tell I’m excited:-)
Anyway, this is just the beginning of all the talking and communication that
we’re gonna be able to have, cause I’m HOME!!!!!!!!!
peace to the fam, and one love for ALL the love that you constantly give! ya’ll
are my rocks, my foundation, my peeps, my family! and my appreciation for you
runs deep.
talk to you soon friends…....
Mar 28, 2005 08:09 PM
Fam-a-lam
How's the breeze blowing?
Everything is good over here! I mean, a lot is happening, but I'm feeling great!
And there is so many people from the fam that I've been able to meet and chill
with and it's been real cool. The show is going incredibly well. It's so much
fun to put this show together, and to be able to see it blossom and grow into
something real. It's so much fun every night to transform into this time and
place. It feels real. Like I belong in that time, a time of big music and big
fun, sensual songs and real gentlemen and ladies. I like living in that world
for that hour and a half.
I also feel like I've been learning so much lately. Like the craziest situations
will happen and at first I'll wonder why but then I'll realize that it's all
to show me something, to teach me something. Even though sometimes is uncomfortable
to get the lesson from different situations, instead of getting mad or frustrated.
There is so much to build from, So much to grow into.
There is so much to question. For real, cause something else I've noticed is
people WILL NOT volunteer information. They will try to take as much advantage
of our ignorance as possible. That's why one of the most important questions
I ask whenever necessary is WHY? If someone can't explain why, then they are
not telling you everything, they're not telling the whole truth.
Someone I know called me blunt the other day. Saying “You don't have to
be so blunt". And it's true you don't have to be blunt in a mean way, But
I think it's really good to be a blunt, honest person. Say the truth as you
mean it. I think there are so many things that become misunderstood or not handled
properly because everyone gets into this habit of saying half the truth. For
whatever reason. Be it not to hurt someone, or offend someone, or come off badly
.but in the end all of those negative things happens anyway, if you don't say
what you really mean. Of course there is a thing called tact .which is just
the way in which you choose to say something. cause just the way you form an
answer can be the difference between offending someone or not, sounding mean
or not, being a jerk or not. Ya know? It's delicate. As important as it is to
tell the truth, it is just as important to put some thought into what you say
and the way you say it.
Anyway, I'm kind of rambling at this point.
The Unplugged album is looking really good. Everything is not 100% official
yet, but if all goes well (which it will) we will shoot it sometime in July
and it will be such an experience to be able to break down my songs to their
simplest, purest form. I'm already thinking of different arrangement and songs
I'll want to include. I'm really looking forward to it.
Well, I'm bout to head off and get a massage. Just relax and think and chill.
The road is rough on your body, but I love it with all my heart!
Once again every time, you show me how much we have grown to mean to each other
and how I have the best FAM on the planet!!
One love always.
And Thank you so much for your continuous generosity when it comes to “Keep
A Child Alive”. It means so much in a world often so shallow.
Till next time
(which hopefully wont be 6 months from now)
LOL! I'm kidding!!!!!!
Yours,
AK
Feb 17, 2005 01:05 AM
Forgive me for taking so long. I've barely had a minute to even sit with all
that has happened back to back. But NOTHING has touch me as deeply as this amazing
selfless gift that you have given me for my birthday! I can't believe how thoughtful
you all have been. That you have thought bigger than any individual gain of
you or I and went directly to the bigger picture where indeed it is true that
we as a people CAN and WILL change the world....means more to me than these
words can ever express!
Sometimes when you speak you wonder if anyone is even listening. If anyone understands
the depth of your words.
You absolutely do and have!
And I want to thank you for the best present I've ever recieved in my entire
life!
I am thanking you for me and I am thanking you for all these kids and mothers
and families that you are helping to do a daily Miracle.....LIVE!
My goodness, I am speachless!
and you all are more special than I could have ever imagined!
truly!
My love 4ever!
Your friend,
Alicia
Dec 30, 2004 02:02 AM
I was floating through the boards and I came across a post about love. I found
it interesting because the ARE so many degrees of love (as you all said in varying
ways).
But it got me to thinking about the word and definition of love. How much we
seem to depend on others to make us feel loved. Yet even that is a strange thought,
because on one hand if we depend on others to tell us, show us, that they love
us and we spend all of our time waiting for them to fulfil our expectations
about love. then we don't take anytime to love ourselves, or fall in love with
ourselves or know ourselves, or treat ourselves lovely or lovingly its like
we get stuck in this pattern of defining love by what someone ELSE feels about
us instead of how we feel about OURSELVES!
On the other hand, no matter what anyone says, everyone needs someone to love,
someone they can show their love to and receive love in return, ya know?
Then there are times when we get so afraid of love, that we get so afraid of
love, that we don't even take the chance with it. And never know the power of
depth and goodness that love can bring. Even if it ends one day, then we at
least were fearless enough to experience it while it lasted and gain from it
what we may.
Then there's that love that we think is love because we are attached to it in
some deep way and we THINK it feels good, but really it's more often bad and
hard to deal with or breaks our hearts and is really unhealthy for us. But we
continue to deal with it because somewhere inside of us we really feel that
LOVE can change the situation for the better.
I don't know, it's a mystery in a way this love thang.
But I guess there are certain things about love that are forever, like if you
give it you will get it. If you believe in it, it will exist for you. And even
where you're in love you can't be blind. Because if you don't love yourself,
no one else will know how to.
It's necessary for us to love ourselves and know we deserve only the best from
the people we give our love to and nothing less. Or they don't deserve us. That's
the most important thing about love to me.
Thoughts on an interesting topic.
Dec 25, 2004 11:34 PM
You didn’t think I would forget to write this year huh? ;-)
Merry Christmas family!
Right now, I am in my crib listening to Nat King Cole sing me Christmas carols.
I feel blessed to be able to spend this Christmas in a warm home and reflect
on the things that really mean something to me. After going, going, going this
is like the best present in the world for me!
I know how distorted Christmas can get. Sometimes it seems like everyone is
in it for all the wrong reasons. Every channel on TV is buy, buy, buy, sell,
sell, sell! And it gets very frustrating. We wonder, has everyone lost the meaning?
In some ways maybe we have, and that’s why so many of us feel lost during
Christmas. Maybe that’s why we feel purposeless, or just bored and down.
But although Christmas has become "commercialized", there are certain
things about Christmas that will never die.
One of them being, the birth of greatness. No matter what you believe in, spiritually
or religiously, that greatness means you and me! The day we were born represents
a miracle. We represent that anything is possible. We are the culmination of
love. We are everything embodied in flesh and blood. So when they talk about
Christmas being the birth of Christ, it also symbolized the birth of you and
I and the way that we can give people joy. That is what the celebration is about.
Everything we are is amazing! Everything we can be is limitless!
The other thing that will never die no matter how commercialized Christmas becomes
is . LOVE
For real, the whole world revolves around it. We all need someone to love us,
someone that says no matter what, I am here for you, I will love you through
your mistakes and walk with you on this journey you are traveling. Love is the
real reason for Christmas. To show love to everyone you meet. Give someone that
gift once a day. Even when Christmas is long gone ..It’s like, this time
of year reminds us of the goodness that is in the world, the purity that is
within us, the compassion that we have to offer.
The joy we can give, with a smile, a hug, the words, "I love you".
The meaning of the little things that can be taken for granted on a regular
basis.
So, don’t be disappointed in Christmas. Use it to face the hate that surrounds
us and combat it with love. If you see something happening in your family, in
your life, on the street, anywhere around you that makes you sad, or makes you
feel hurt, use Christmas as a time to talk about it. Maybe tell someone that
you love them and you’ve noticed their sadness and as someone who cares
you just want to be able to talk or listen. Sometimes the sadness comes from
years of no one listening, or even caring to ask. Not that we can solve all
problems, but if we talk more, we can understand each other more, ya know? We
just get mad and never say anything because we’re too angry to address
our feelings.
I think maybe that’s the lost art of Christmas time CARING!
Not about silly things we can buy at the store. But about what’s in each
other’s hearts. If we talk more, we can judge less.
There are so many suffering, so many that don’t even have a family to visit,
let alone talk to. There are so many who are sick and can’t afford a hospital
let alone a gift for their children. There are so many things going on in the
world and with all of us as well. Lets make Christmas a time to remember at
least one thing we have to be thankful for, to be happy about, to celebrate.
ONE thing. Even something as simple as laughter or a smile.
That one thing can put everything into perspective.
We are the greatest creation in the universe and with our CARING we are the
greatest gift to each other.
Let’s live in the spirit of goodness and feel the power of love all year
long.
Happy Holidays my family.
I wish you all the love in the world.
Alicia
Now 28, 2004 01:34 AM
Honestly, I haven't written for awhile because I was trying to get over the
games cats was playing about the death of that young lady. I didn't think that
was funny.In fact, there always will come a time when people want to take advantage
of your sincerity. Feel me when I say that shit wasn't cute! But I know that
didn't represent everyone, and one monkey don't stop no show!
Anyway moving on... far, far away
Getting home for the holidays is a BEAUTIFUL feeling!!! Can't even describe
it. i got home on Tuesday night from an amazing day in Chitown, and I've been
doing my best to relax ever since.
Seeing the faces that I love, eating great food. I played more scrabble in these
last two days than my entire life. I never thought I liked it like that, but
hey, now I know! And I stay getting beaten by 10 years old! It's pretty pathetic,
but so cute!
I've had such a ball meeting you on another side whit this book. I love the
way you come to me whit the pages of the poem that you like the best open. That
makes me smile the
biggest cheese It amazes me to see the words that resonate within different
people. I wonder sometimes, what way you are interpreting it, Ya know? Like
is it directly from a place in your life? Or are you picturing mine? I don't
know, but it's interesting to think about. When I read Langston Hughes or someone
that I love, I guess I kind of read into it both ways. What provoked him to
write it and how he's talks about my life in some way. I guess the reality is
that anything we can relate to comes from the fact it feels like something out
of our life, our experience in one way or another. Right?
It's been incredible to see you in this new light, through these words that
continue to bind us together.
I have till Monday off, then off to Toronto for the Urban Aids concert. I can't
believe I haven't been to Canada whit this album yet. How did that happen? I
love it up there, so I'm excited about going. This year has been unreal .and
dammit, it ain't done! LOL
Well, just wanted to holla atcha I know It's been awhile.
Wishing you the best of the holidays, the gosdness, the love, the family, the
magic!
Giving thanks for every day
Love=love
Oct 28, 2004 12:29 PM
Family,
I'm just coming on.
It's so crazy when you lose someone, expecially when you see or hear from that
person everyday in someway. It's like this shock,that makes you realize your
own mortality, or rather, just how you never know what life can bring.
I remember the day I met Leah on the ladies first tour. There was a big group
that she was with, a mixture of people, and I remember these little kids in
particular that I had so much fun meeting and buggin' out with. But when I saw
her, it lit me up even more because I knew her from the boards and that's always
really special to me. Putting a face with the name is something I love. She
was shining bright, excited! And we talked about things and laughed and took
that picture. Immediately when I heard the name and heard what happened, I knew
who it was.
Memories are sweet because they never let you stop holding onto the goodness
that you experience with people that you connect with. You can call on them
anytime, when you need it.
The only thing for us to do is to live life with renewed excitement and wonder,
because each day is such a brand new experience. With new tastes, new views,
new visions, new smells, new parts to discover within us and outside of us.
We are so blessed to open our eyes. To be able to get out of bed, and walk and
see and smell and taste, and laugh and cry, all those things we do everyday
so frivolously. We are so blessed even when we are sad or pained because it
makes us see all the sides we have within, makes us more compassionate, and
allows us to appreciate that shine we have inside.
God is with us every second, in every mile, in every smile, in every tear, and
now.
I think I can speak for all of us when I say we send our condolences to Leah's
family and wish them peace in their hearts during this difficult time. And we
are proud to have Leah as an angel protecting us.
Thank God everyday!
For life,
For endless possibility,
For angels
All my love
Alicia
Oct 18, 2004 01:00 PM
What’s good?
Everything is everything over here. I see things are still poppin as usual on
the home front.
I was going to write a whole thing about what’s going on over here, but
I don’t think now is the time; I’ll wait a little while. The one thing
that I have to say is really good about everyone always having different opinions
on who you are and what you should or shouldn’t be is that it really challenges
you to know how YOU really feel. It’s very interesting I must say. It’s
a very good character study, in a way. Self-character study if you know what
I mean. If I was out here concerned with what every single person thought was
right or wrong, I would surely be insane by now. I say this for all of us, really.
Not for anyone in particular, so please don’t go taking these words all
personal, I mean this in general, as a whole. We all have to know that each
of us are different, and we all have different things that we are experiencing
and learning that make us into ourselves. We have to spread our wings. How does
it feel when the wind blows through them? How would we know if we never opened
them up? Don’t, not do what you feel because you don’t want people
to judge you or you don’t want people to have something negative to say.
Please, that’s a prison sentence. Making choices to suit others? Or god-forbid,
even worse, staying the same so that no one will question your intentions? Oh
my goodness that’s like burying yourself. I just hope that we don’t
stifle ourselves and stop ourselves from our greatness or even our greatest
mistakes because we fear what others think of us, instead let us be honest with
what we think about OURSELVES!!!!!!! We’re so quick to talk about everyone
else, but what about ourselves? What about looking at ourselves?
I’ll tell you what; the biggest thing I’m looking at with myself now
is how I can make a change. How I can make a change on a bigger level? The first
step for me is making sure that I am a part of this years’ election. This
to me is for sure one of the most important dates we will live through and be
a part of. Feel my urgency! I know a lot of us still feel a helpless feeling
but we gotta negate that! We are not helpless. We are unaware of the power we
are capable of. We are limitless and we have to help each other to be unstoppable
and relentless with this, this year. I challenge us to not let this slip through
our fingers. Let’s look at ourselves and see the power. Let’s encourage
each other instead of judging each other and lets go VOTE! I appreciate all
of your opinions, I think they are all valid, now let’s take our strong
opinions and use it for something unforgettably worthwhile. Let’s show
them that we know what’s going on in the world and we won’t be taken
for a ride of their choosing. Let’s show them that we are the heartbeat
of America and we want to stand up!
For any more info go to
www.yourvotematters.org
Let’s do this!
AK
Oct 6, 2004 12:44 PM
HIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!
I'm here in Singapore getting the hair braided up.
I've been having a ball here!
Every morning I wake up and look out the window onto Beijing, Kuala Lumpur,
Hong Kong, or Singapore and I'm in awe......Wow, How am I here?
Anyway, I'm really trying to make sure I see these beautiful places so far away
from what I know and where I grew up. Last night I went on a Night Safari. Incredible.
Seeing all these nocturnal animals, without cages. Watching them. Hearing the
sound of the wind and the noises of the jungle. I saw bats up close. They were
actually cute. Asian Elephants, leopards, lions, A golden cat,flying squirrels,
hyenas, swamp deer, and so many other beuatiful Animals. The sad thing is that
there used to be so many more of them. Many of them are on the verge of extinction,
but to see them up close reminds you of how precious and special God's creatures
are.
Then today I went out to the market in Chinatown and saw the most beautiful
things. Masks hand carved out of gorgoeus woods, beads of jade and tiger eyes.
I had so much fun it was ridiculous! I had the best Fish with Ginger and beansprouts
with smoked fish. It sounds kind of scary, but it was the BOMB!! It was nice
to experience traditional Singapore.
Now, I'm gearing up to do the show tomorrow and i have a crazy good feeling
about it!! The people here are kind. Open and giving. I love the vibe. I love
the culture, I love how God is so present in everyday life. A first priority.
This is probably one of the most memorable times in my life. I'm taking a million
pictures and recording everything. I just don't want to forget.I don't want
to wake up 25 years from now, and only see one big blur. I want it to be clear.
I want to really have lived these moments, not just have past through them.
Ya know?
Thank God
for you, for this, for life....everyday
I'll talk to you soon
p.s. miss you too!
Oh yea and P.P.S
That stupid ass My boo cover is DEFINETLY a fake!!! I am a stand up woman, you
think I'd EVER be caught behind some man looking like a damn backdrop??? NEVER!!!
When I saw that damn picture I was furious someone would even put my name on
some bullshit like that. Y'all already knew that I know, but just to put your
mind at ease, That is a bogus piece of computer fiction.
eeewwwww, some people have NO class!!
ok, now that that's off my chest we can go back to reality.
Sep 23, 2004 04:13 PM
Oh yea, one more thing
I LOVED the book! It is beautiful and soooo kind of all of you to send such
warmth out here to me on this cold road.;-) Ya'll are so thoughtful and the
way the book is put together is sooo creative. ( I love the cover!)
There's no one like you!
thank you
love,
Ak
Sep 23, 2004 04:00 PM
So here I am, half way across the world. I still can't believe it! My body is
toooooo confused. LOL! Right now it is 3:42 AM in China, 3:42 pm in New York,
and 12:42 pm in L.A where I just was before coming to China so you can see why
my body is looking at me like, "huh?"
It took us 12 hours to fly here. One of the longest flights I've ever taken.
But some of my crew left from NY and that is a 16-hour flight. Wow! But I have
to say, long flight or not, I am ecstatic about being here! About going to Malaysia
and Indonesia, and Hong Kong, and Japan, and Australlia and New Zealand, and
there's more but I can't think of them right now. But I'm just like, how does
this happen? How does the music swim so far across so many oceans and so many
cultures and so many languages? How does it bring us together like this in such
a heavenly way? That's why I KNOW GOD is in the music. There is no other explanation!
Today I went to this place called the Forbidden City, where the Ming Dynast
Ruled. It's incredible to go to these places and imagine what it was like in
the days that they existed. These are whole huge places with beautiful designs
and intention, Grandeur to the point of conceit. But this was a way of life,
culture and tradition and belief like no other that lasted thousands and thousands
of years. It's amazing.
I close my eyes and try to picture life then
Tomorrow is the first trip I make to the Great Wall of China. I can't wait to
see it. Imagine all of those many hands building ONE wall! Can you imagine?
All of those many people coming together to create that one, long, huge barrier,
It's unbelievable almost. Those are the things that make us more powerful than
we ever think. Those are the things that show us the greatness of our collective
unity. Those are the reasons we're created in God's likeness. We so so so special.
And if you are ever unsure, think of this!
It is late here
I'm going to get some rest for
tomorrow.
Talk to you soon
Much respect
Ak, from the other side of the world
Sep 8, 2004 12:35 AM
OK, don't beat me up;-)
I know it's been awhile. I'm trying to think of the last time we spoke. Let
me check
DAMN! Almost a whole month??
Wow! I don't blame you if you feel neglected. But of course, it's never, ever
my intention.
Anyway, No, I haven't been asleep for that long;-) I've been we'll I guess you
know what I've been doing. In fact you guys know things about me, I don't even
know. I read some things you post and I'm "Wow! Am I doing that?"
LOL!
One thing that you don't know is I snuck away on a little vacation right after
the VMA's. I know that with everything that is going to be going on; going to
China, Japan, Australia and New Zealand, things are going to be pretty strenuous,
so I knew that I'd better take a little rejuvenation time while I could snatch
it. I did and it was gorgeous. I went to the mountains. The sun would be bright
and beautiful and then around 4pm, the skies would open and it would pour down
rain, It smells soooo good. Liquid sunshine. Isn't that a crazy visual? I got
a chance to just be. Niice! What else?
The Karma video is bananas! I don't know if you're ready .;-)
It's late, this is kind of a bogus entry being that I've been away so long (I
can admit it) but I just wanted you to know that I haven't vanished off the
face off the diary. Ha! I'm here, ain't going nowhere. We gots lots more to
do together Shit! We're just warming up.
One love forever!
Ak
Aug 14, 2004 12:31 AM
Peace fam,
How are you feeling? I’m feeling well. Promised myself that I’m going
to get some nice , sleep-till-you-wake-up-sleep tonight. It’s been a little
while so I’m overdue for some R&R. But of course as I’m relazing
and getting ready from some shut-eye, I had to slide through and see what’s
going on with my road dogs!!!!!!
So basically, I guess you have figured out the voice mail number is no longer
in existence. I loved being able to have a secret connection with ya’ll,
but as you see it’s causing WAY to much trouble. First, with all the crazy
things on the news with people that are getting harassed. (I feel bad about
that cause who wants to get 50 million calls that are not even for you! ;-))
and then with whatever smart ass hacking into my voicemail and leaving some
BOGUS message, that just put the icing on the cake! I mean I was willing to
be dogged in the press about people receiving random phone calls, but for someone
to disrespect my privacy and leave some phoney message? I’m not feeling
that! So I had to dead it!
Fortunately, you don’t have to worry cause I have some fly ideas that I
think will make up for that. I’ll let you know about it once it’s
all solidified .
Right now I’m chillin’ out listening to some old Roberta Flack. I
love it. A nice way to end the night and enter into my Sleep-till-I wake-up-sleep
that I’m so looking forward to.
There’s been a lot of going on, much I’m sure that you want to know
about but I’m gonna have to tell you when I wake up LOL!
Don’t hold me to that, but you know I’ll be back soon to holla.
Take care of yourself and for all those that were wondering .
HELL MUTHAF*CKN YEAH I’m VOTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And I’m expecting all my people on here that can vote to rock with me on
that!!!!!!!!;-)
And even if you can’t personally vote, I’m counting on you to urge
someone that you know who can, to do it for you, for them, for US!
One love
Always yours
AK
P.S. So ya’ll liked my feisty interview? I had no idea I was feeling that
defiant until I read it and remembered my state of mind.
Hey, its good to be raw and uncut sometimes, why not?;-)
Jul 31, 2004 04:13 AM
I have a serious Staying-up-to-late problem
But before I go to bed I’m gonna answer some of those silly questions from
a million years ago. LOL!
Do U like Rollercoaster’s?
When I was little I used to like anything except the ones that flipped around
in the air. I am more of a water park kinda girl but now I love rollercoaster’s
too. I get CRAZY nervous before it starts. That’s the thrill though, and
there’s nothing like it!
Have u ever forgotten words on stage?
Yep! It’s pretty funny, cause while I’m singing I realize that I’m
singing the wrong thing. Then by that time the crowd has helped me get back
on track or I just start freestylin’
How long does it take you to sign fan club photos?
At the expense of legible handwriting I have become a human printing press!
LOL
Are u afraid to be recognized at the bakery?
I’m not really the bakery type, but maybe I should get into it;-)
When are you coming to Denver?
I know right? I feel the same way.
Boxers or briefs?
I like the ones that are kind of a mixture of the two. Unless the boxers are
silk ..
What’s your favorite perfume?
My favorite is this new one I’ve discovered called honey water. It’s
light and gentle and a beautiful scent
R you cranky in the morning?
I’m pretty good at getting up. I’ve always had to be able to function
on little sleep, so I’m pretty good at it. But after about a week or two
of very little sleep I DEFENTLY get cranky
How many copies did you buy of your own cd?
That’s funny because I have a little ritual. I believe that if you don’t
support yourself, no one else will. So at 12am the night the album is released,
I go into at least one record store and cause a big fuss. I go over to the section
where they are selling my CD’s and I start saying things like, “ Have
ya’ll heard this? This right here is FIYAH!!!” and things like that.
Then all the people look at me like I’m crazy until they figure out what’s
going on and a little mini signing event usually happens. Then I’ll pick
up about 30 copies and set if off! That’s always fun and everyone in the
store gets a kick out of it.
It usually provokes people who maybe wouldn’t buy the album to get one
just so that they can give some one they know an autographed album. I act a
fool! Pretty funny huh?
What animal would u compare yourself to?
A Jaguar!
Goodnight
Good morning
What ever it is I’m going to sleep
Talk to you soon
Alicia
Jul 27, 2004 01:49 PM
Well, Here I am, on a rainy tuesday afternoon, in New York City. And there's
no place I'd rather be! It's soooo nice to be home. Europe was INCREDIBLE! I
mean really UNFORGETTABLE!!! Every single place holds its own memories. London,
Manchester, Paris, Vienne, Norway, Finland, Sweden, Belgium, Amsterdam, Italy,
Spain, Germany. And that's just to name a few. I could go on and on it seems.
This was so special and although I was gone for 2 months straight (Europe) and
2 months straight before that (U.S.) this has definately been one of my most
memorable summers EVER! Really. So thank you everyone out there, for having
a ball with me and teaching me so much, for showing me so much!
Now, I'm here taking out my braids.I just want my hair to be free. All my wild
and crazy curls are gonna be happy!!!
LOL
I plan to go see my nana and catch up on some good ole family time. That is
always so rejuvenating and necessary.
There's a lot coming up that I'm so excited about. I'm shooting the video for
Karma in about 2 weeks (and YES it will be in Europe AND the U.S so no worries)
It's going to be different for me; a new style. I like it like that! I also
have come up with a title for the book that I am ready to share with you. I'm
going to call it "Tears for water" The whole explanation of why I'm
calling it that is in the book so I won't spoil the suprise and tell you, but
I love it!! I can't believe that my first book is going to be published. It's
unreal in a sense. But my while heart is in there.
At first I was a little nervous about that, feeling as if it would be "exposing"
too much. But after going through the process, It's really been refreshing and
challenging in a good way!! It taught me and reminded me a lot about myself
and I'm proud to be able to let you into another side of my mind..
This morning I made me some breakfast after crawling out of my OWN bed and I
looked around and thanked GOD for always keeping us safe. Each day we open out
eyes WOW! What a miracle! Don't forget!
All my love
Alicia
Jul 13, 2004 11:34 AM
Here I am in Barcelona! One of my favorite cities I'm discovering.
Althought the sun isn't as bright as I wish it was, It's still beautiful here.
I always get lost in the language. It mesmorizes me. I'm on the way to the venue,
Just wanted to write and say hey. All is well, looking forward to the show tonight
and seeing all the fam that is gonna be there. I can always spot you in a crowd;-)
I love the enthusiasm!
Just a quick hello
I'll write soon.........
P.S BIG UP to everyone whose been supporting "The Reign" The Brand
New KK mixtape. It's crazy! This tape is hot like fire, I'm rocking to it right
now!
Love the fam
stay up!
Always,
AK
Jul 10, 2004 12:14 PM
There are so many things to write about.
Let me start with The Montreux Jazz festival in Switzerland.
Coming to Switzerland was a nice change because the sun was there to welcome
us. Nice to feel it on your face. It's amazing how much the weather can affect
your attitude. The way the mountains and the water met and followed each other
up and down the street was so much like a painting. It was beautiful. The streets
were electric with all the people excited about the festivities. The feeling
permeated the air. And me, I'm jus thinking the whole time, how many incredible
people had been here before me. As I looked out on the streets I wondered about
how the people must have looked and dressed and seemed to somebody like Miles
Davis when he came and played here.
We did the show that night and it was beautiful, magical and very exciting.
Once again the whole time I was just thankful to be able to play in a place
that had so much history. But honestly it wasn't until the next day that I truly
got the full spectrum of just how much history Montriux held.
We were invited up to the house of the man who started the festival over 38
years ago. He lived up in the mountains and if the view was incredible from
my hotel room down below, I can't even begin to explain the way the view looked
from up aobve. The mountains were immense. The sun was so warm and the way ever
single chair and hammock was set up toward the vast view made you reflect as
you looked out onto the water and the hills. It did feel like everywhere you
turned could be a painting. As if you were merely a vision from an artist from
above. Which we are, but you felt it. And it made me see how differently you
can see life, depending on how you live it. I felt the beauty of the world from
up there and the way that your mind can be clear to think. Anyway, that's only
some of the point. But the rest is what left me feeling...I don't know I can't
describe, let me just explain.
The Gentleman who started this festival has an unbelievable archive of ALL the
people that have ever performed at the Montreux Jazz festival. I'm talking about
all 38 years of it. It's incredible. Every single person that has ever graced
the stage. Miles Davis, Marvin Gaye, Aretha Franklin, Ray Charles, Nina Simone.
And that is just to name a few.
He put on the performance of Aretha Franklin in 1971, it was one of the most
incredible things I'd ever seen. She had to be like 23 years old. She was a
baby and singing and playing the piano with all her heart. You felt her spirit
leap onto the screen. It was indescribable! But the most amazing one was to
see Nina Simone Play in 1976. She had just come back from Africa and you could
feel her anger. You could feel her intense feelings about the way that musicians,
especially black Musicians were treated, the way people were treated and all
that was going on in America that she obviously felt ambivalence toward. You
could tell she felt like she didn't really belong anywhere. But her playing...Oh
my goodness her PLAYING!!!!!She played the piano as if her life depended on
it. Her fluidity was incredible. She was speaking exactly from her heart and
her pain and her insecurities and all the things that made her think, politically,
personally, in every way came out through the piano and her voice. Her expression
was genuine and real and deep! And it was really something that ripped through
my whole core!!! All the times that I have ever thought about how much I wish
I could see some of my favorite artists that are no longer here, and how I would
just like to see the way they did it, what their approach was, things like that.
And I was looking directly at it, with my own two eyes. I was mesmerized and
inspired beyond belief.
It got me to thinking. It's like the thing about artists then, is how serious
they were about their craft! How artists like Nine Simone, James Baldwin, and
Langston Hughes, they THOUGHT! They had things to say! and opinions about what
was going on around them, about things that others were afraid to discuss. They
embraced the challenged and said what the heart of the people were thinking
but never would have the voice to express. They were the leaders of a movement
of a generation that needed to be heard. They were not so afraid and not so
stuck on the fame or the money, but the message and standing their ground, creating
their own freedom.
It affected me in such a deep way. It made me feel like I want to be remembered
for things like that. Important things. I am still finding my way like we all
are, but I want to search deeper and be remembered for being different, for
being unafraid to be vocal and active. Be strong and stand for something that
endures.
I went back to my hotel and played the shit out of my piano!;-)
Nina Simone was bad!!!!(not bad meaning bad but bad meaning good) and you gotsta
practice your ass off to be Bad!!!;-)
Just a little recap on the experience, unreal, and provoking!
I love it like that!
Thinking about y'all...and feeling the vibe on the boards.
keep rockin....
This is going to be an unforgettable journey we are on together, I can't even
begin to imagine where it will lead us to.......;-)
peace
Ak
Jul 2, 2004 11:48 PM
Hey
Did you miss me?
Man I've been kinda bananas. I haven't even been on the board for a while and
you know that's not a norm for me as I am an admitted addicted of the board;-)
Anyway I got a chance to catch up and it's good to be back. Right now I'm here
in Germany on my way to Switzerland. I can't wait to go! I here that it's going
to be beautiful there. I'm going to play the same place that Marvin Gaye did
years ago. WOW! Yall know how I feel about him. That is going to be very special
for me to touch the stage he touched once.
Sometimes when I'm on stage I look out to you and I just think "Oh my goodness"
and I just want to live every moment like it is my last, because God forbid
if it ever is, I know that I didnt take it for granted and that I enjoyed it
for all it was. Really that's what you teach me. To enjoy every moment.
I've been doing very well. You would all be proud of me, taking my vitamins
and everythang! I have been flying back and forth across the atlantic like a
madwoman, but I always pray and God keeps me safe. Plus I have so much to do!
It's not my time yet.
The Shows in Europe have been unreal! For real. There's been this crazy vibe
floating thru everything and making it very magical. Today in Bonn was really
special and I want to big up everyone I was able to meet afterward. It always
shocks me to put faces to the names I know so well on the board. I love getting
the chance to talk to you in person. Thanks for the love. For real! All of you,
I mean it!
This sucks, but my bus rolls out in 10 minutes and I know I have to go but I
just had to at least check in and say what's up. Cause I've been getting it
from all angles lol "Alicia hurry up and write! We miss you!" But
I'm not mad at that, believe me!
I'm reading a new James Baldwin book. It's so deep. I'll tell you more about
it later, but in it there was a line that said "Nobody can stay in the
Garden of Eden".... It got me to thinking cause I'm like, all our lives
it's like we're searching for this Garden of Eden yet even if we find it, something
about us is always searching for more. So do we ever find it, something about
us is always searching for more. So do we ever find this Garden of Eden? Or
is it just something for us to strive for? Maybe that is what he meant when
he said Nodody can stay in the Garden of Eden.
I'm not sure, but what I do know is, knowing that something sweeter is out there
somewhere sure does give us something to look forward to and I know there's
nothing wrong with looking forward to the sweetness that comes with the search.
It brings out the best in you......
It's late, I gotta roll
love 4eva
A to da K;-)
May 18, 2004 8:58 pm
Me? forget about u? NEVER!!!! Not in a million years! Never could I forget about
the people that have been there for me from the very very start. The people
who's names and faces I know. Who's problems and pains and hurts sympathize
with and understand Not you, whose personalities make me laugh and reflect.
Naw, not you!!!
Hey, I know its been some time.
Being in Europe was wonderful. I had a good time. Normally when I head to Europe
there are so many things that I have to do, that I really never enjoy the moments
the way that I know that I can, but this time it was different. I guess I'm
finally starting to understand what works for me and negate the things that
just make things to complicated or more grueling than necessary.
Unfortunately though, it was not warm until I got to Monte Carlo where I stayed
the night and drove to Cannes in the morning. But there it was beautiful. A
taste of summer. I had never been there before. I only heard about the prestigious
festival and was very excited to see it with my own eyes. The water, the sky,
the mountains in the distance all made for a flawless landscape. You know how
you see those old movies and you can tell that the background and scenery is
fake, well that is exactly how it looked. The whole thing looked fake. Even
the way the sun set, but it was real! It was real, and once again God was right
there, in all His mighty glory and patience. The other day I realized that no
only is God a painter, but He is also a Director of Photography. I looked at
the sky one day and all the shadows and light I saw was exactly what every great
photographer tries to capture. And God shows us everyday. You can even watch
the sun set behind the project and see God if you look. Wow. I am always humbled
by that thought.
Sometimes I look around in amazement at everything. I mean my life is no fairytale
story. It has and has yet to see the struggle and pain and continuous hard work
for the reward of joy in a content heart, but wow, sometimes I look around and
I'm just like......speechless. And again I am humbled.
Being on those stairs in Cannes where all the greats have been like Audrey Hepburn,
was pretty incredible and DAMN intimidating LOL! I mean, I am someone who never
really lets nerves get the best of me and even if I feel it, I keep it cool
as ice on the exterior. But it felt like there must have been about 70,000 photographers
all screaming and clicking and clicking and yelling and some were on the right
and some were on the left and by time I got throught the sea of lights and flash
trying to hold my most gracious smile and posture I wasn't sure what the hell
happened and did I completely look like an orge? LOL!
It was quite funny and as a virgin to that scene I couldn't help but laugh at
myself. It was great though. I really was and I am looking so forward to the
passion of acting.
I really see it as very similar to music in many ways. It is an expression of
a feeling of a moment that can speak to your heart forever. It is a story waiting
for the breath of life. It is the truth in you.
I can't wait to keep finding the things that speak to me. Not only in acting,
not only in music, but in everything!!!!! In my life.
Rome was magnificant!!! The weather was incredible and the cause was even more
beautiful than anything else. The whole day I was just soaring. I couldn't wait
to talk through song about how I feel about what's going on in the world. About
how crazy it is that we are abusing each other with no regard. And the thought
of the things that the children in those numerous countries see with their own
eyes is........is there even a word for it? It's heartbreaking. It breaks my
heart when I turn on the TV or read the newspaper.
How can we just keep repeating the same thing over and over from generation
to generation and not say anything about it. So this was my chance. Just to
say the way that I felt. I put together something very specific and I really
had a beautiful time doing it. Especially Soldier's Cry and when the young Mr
Marley stepped on the stage. His essence is so close to his father to me. His
voice is so full of feeling and the feeling that I was feeling was even more
enhanced with his presence. It was unforgettable!
These are the things that give me a true sense of worth. In a major way!
Listen, I better get going before I write a novel on these pages. But before
I go let me say, I will never be afraid of growth or change, or of something
new or old as it is the journey that excites me. The challange is remaing connected
not to the things I can own but to the lessons of the past, and the integrity
and nobility in my heart.
Just had to let you know that no matter what, no matter where, when or how I
will NEVER forget what is important.
It's just not in me.
Love,
Alicia
P.S. Also, do me a favour and don't believe everything you read......
May 6, 2004 12:14 am
Ok
lemme answer some. I like this.
The latin Billboards were AMAZING. I was able to be in Miami for two days before
and got in the vibe of the weather and the atmosphere. I learned the spanish
in that time, but it felt like it was 2nd nature. I love singing it in spanish.
It flows so beautiful.
When I went to the rehearsal I realized the even the people who put the event
together were special. Just kind people. A lot of times at these award shows
everyone is rushing so much that the vibe is kinda WACK. But they were gracious
from the beginning and that set up the vibe lovely. Then when I met the legendary
Arturo Sandoval, it elevated the experience a million times. This is a man with
incredible musicians like Dizzy Gillesppe and Quincy Jones and STILL practices
everyday!!!! FEEL me! There are the type of cats that keep me motivated. The
best at it, still aiming to get better. I love it!
Anyway, the day of the show we got together, my band and his family. We had
lunch and hung out, playing pool and blackjack for 25 cents, playing music and
chillin. It was all love! That sealed it. When we hit the stage it was magic!
I knew it was going to be special, cause everyone felt connected. I had a ball.
Everyone welcome me with open arms and I truly appreciated that :)
ps. I remember saying hi to you girl!
It’s not until I’ve written, sang and recorded and it really sinks into me.
Then as I begin to perform it I learn more and more about it. The nuances of
it, how I want to place it, what emotions it makes me feel everytime I sing
it and then it happens naturally. The song flips itself in a way. Or if there’s
a special show that comes up, I’ll cater an arrangement to compliment that.
I love flipping songs. It’s freedom.
Plus I gotta amp myself up as well as u!
The last cd I bought was Musicology and Anita Baker’s Rapture, which is one
of my favourite albums of all time so I had to buy it again recently.
I may come back and answer more tonight..........
May 5 2004, 10:23pm
OK, I’ve kept you waiting long enough haven’t I?
WASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP???
Today is the first day in I don’t know how long that I have been home!! And
even though I leave again on Friday there is NOTHING in the whole world like
coming home after a long time. Everything seems new and fresh and just comforting.
For all of my family that is so sweetly concerned about my well being and rest,
I want you to know that I took a couple of days off after the tour was over
and just relaxed and got some nice rest and cleared my mind.
I went somewhere with mountains and it was gorgeous.
I am admittedly a water kind of woman but have you ever just stared at some
mountains? It’s unreal!!!! Growing up where I did, the only mountains I ever
saw were concrete buildings, so to be in the presence of real mountains and
their strength, you just feel something. I don’t know if it’s the mystery of
all that those mountains have seen or what, but its incredible.
Other than that I’m doing well! My spirits are soaring and my mind is focused!
I’m on my way to Europe soon and I’m looking forward to seeing what it feels
like there in some warm weather.
EVERYTIME I go, it’s freezing, grey or rainy. So it’s going to be beautiful
to see it in another light. Warm breezes, spring nights. I LOVE when it starts
turning into summer. There is something so sensual about spring and summer.
Something liberating. Something renewed.
Anyway, I’m just checkin in cause I know it’s been a minute and a half.
On another note, I wanna know what you wanna know.
What would you ask me? Make me a thread I’ll pick some and answer in the next
entry.....
All my love to the family.
AK
Apr 10, 2004 03:26 PM
I’m not exactly sure what ya’ll were reading into my message the other
night……..
I was just talking about the beauty of music and what a magical effect it has
on all of us. It’s not a sad thing. It’s a GOOD feeling. I was describing
my JOY in music and sharing wit you! The shows have been off the hook!!!!!!!
Ya’ll have been off the hook!!!!!! Everyone has been with me 200%. It’s
been amazing! I leave those feeling all the excitement, a complete feeling of
satisfaction, and step higher in my craft.
I didn’t really touch on the cancelled M&G in Philly because I thought
you guys understood. So I went into a more poetic side of myself, but let me
come back:-)
You have no idea how hard it was for me to cancel that M&G! It was like
drawing blood with no needle! I mean, that’s how much I care. That happens
to b one of my favorite parts of the night. Meeting and seeing the faces of
the names that I know so well. Being able to share some special one on one time
and just thanking you for always showing me love and soo much support.
When you do shows back to back, it is very taxing on your voice. Using your
voice period, even just speaking take a lot of your voice believe it or not.
So imagine, doing 4 or 5 interviews a day, having general conversation about
business or personal things, and doing 4 shows back to back giving all you got,
as you can, as you can see, it can naturally wear on ones voice. Usually when
I have a lot of shows, I do not talk before hand, just to give myself some rest.
The day of Philly, I wasn’t able to do that and the result of many things
going had an effect on my voice.
The show was still hot! Philly was nothing but love! but I knew that if I didn’t
chill it would only get worse. I sat in my dressing room for like 20 minutes
debating whether or not I should cancel the M&G. I finally decided that
I had to do what was best and be smart and I knew my Family would understand
that, that is what was what I was doing.
So I’m not sick, or sad, or feeling under the weather. For that one night,
I was simply taking care of myself to be able to continue this exciting journey.
I’ve also taken out all interviews and such on days of shows so I can treat
my voice kindly:-) See, it’s all a learning process.
And now, since I was smart I’m 110% babyyeeeeeee!!!!
Now, on to this DC thing. I have NO IDEA what happened. It was the weirdest
thing. But the story that I’m getting is that my DC fam was all in the
right place, but someone said to go somewhere else. Which was the wrong place,
and that’s how the confusion began. I’m sooo sorry that happened,
cause I was really looking forward to meeting my DC fam that was holdin’
me down in a major way! But all I can say for the future is The Will Call window
is the only place that really knows where the meet and greet is going to be.
So once you get your passes from them and they tell you where to go, DON’T
GO ANYWHERE ELSE NO MATTER WHAT!:-)
Anyway, I just wanted to say hey and take a few minutes to clear some things
up. My last post was my more poetic mind process, this one I decided to take
a more chill approach
:-)
I got a little something for everyone LOL
We'll talk soon..................
March 17, 2004 10:55 AM
Family! What's good?
Everything is well on this side. My apologies for no writing sooner. Believe
me I attempted numerous times, but we wer making some changes on the network
side and things got a little funky. Plus I have been grindin'.
:-)
But her, how are you doing? I missed writing but I have been reading when I
can hop on the computer.
So, the first shows have been INCREDIBLE!! Preparing for it was lot of fun cause
I've had a million ideas. And since this is somewhat of a new chapeter for me,
I've been ready to take myself to places I haven't yet gone. Which to me is
the whole point! And I'm ecstatic with the outcome! I mean first of all having
so many
songs and options to play with, its fun to discover the journey of bringing
them to life. Then the musicality of the show just has so many more dimensions.
Valleys and peaks, silences and level raising excitement. But nothing prepared
me for the audience. The love and energy that flows from ya'll. It was insantaneous
and continued all the way through to the last note. The entire time I was on
stage I had this beautifully strange sensation of feeling right at home, as
if I was in my living room, or in a friends garage playin' and zonin', it was
unreal, it was magical to me.
One of the things most fun about my show to me is how raw i chose to keep it.
I didn't want a lot of tricks and smoke and fire, I just wanted to take it back
to
the essence, with innovative musical arrangements, and performing with movement
of the fingers, mind, spirit, and body. Its just so liberating for me to be
able to
go from playing the piano, to doing a little tango, to playing that crazy guitar
sound I created for dragon days and feeling me feeling you on a little red keyboard.
Energy flowing endless. Oh man!
Anyway, of course it's the first coupla shows, so everything was late, and everything
that could go wrong did. But it was sooo humorous. I told the fam
that i saw in florida the story about how Nikki was braiding my hair up to the
last minute even while I was practicing the keys and when it was finally 8pm
and we knew that my hair obviously was not gonna be done in time we looked at
each other like, "So, what we gonna do now?" So I said, " Hey
girl, were just
gonna have to freak a brand new style on cats!!!" (Hence the braids and
bun) But it was too funny and set a nice relaxed tone to the first show in
retrospect. Not taking shit to seriously :-)
Then, as i told the fam yesterday, I'm in the middle of doing You Don't Know
My Name AKA YDKMN (as yall call it), giving it evey drop of my heart, soul,
and
passion. I bent my knees and went down ina furry of expression and the whole
entire back of my pants ripped! I'm on stage in the middle of my talking on
the phone part and to myself I'm like, "Oh my goodness, what the hell am
I gone do now!!!" It was sooo funny, if yall could have just been in my
head,
it was soo great!!!! Anyway, I did the only thing that anyone could do, I took
off the jacket that I had on and casually tied it around my waist as I was talking
to "Michael" on the phone. I just went ahead and took it back to the
schoolyard, you konw it's happened to you at least once in your life!!!!!! It
was toooo hot
yall, and that what I LOVE about live shows!!!! The unexpected! And how it tests
your spirit, your resilience and how quick you can think on your feet! Anyway
I took the song home, gave it all I had, the crowd was VIBIN and after it was
all done i walked off the stage laughing with a smile on my face. Couse I had
FUN, I expressed my music, my mind and myself in truth and honesty and had a
ball!!